The Poetry of Custom License Plates
This evening as I was walking the dog, I was almost run over by a distracted woman in a minivan about to roll through a stop sign. I became even more annoyed when I saw she had a custom license plate that was something like IDRV3KDS.
But then I started thinking, if you're going to bother customizing your plates, you should try for something that's as cheesy as possible. I began to understand more and more that this woman was a particular master in that regard.
As my theory developed, I realized that, because custom plates are inherently self-indulgent and often cringe-inducing, you must follow the folkways of those who came before you in order to achieve greatness in their composition. After all, you can't write a great sonnet without using iambic pentameter.
That got me thinking. What is the best, most poetic custom license plate possible, given the limitations and expectations of the form? Below is what I came up with:
But then I started thinking, if you're going to bother customizing your plates, you should try for something that's as cheesy as possible. I began to understand more and more that this woman was a particular master in that regard.
As my theory developed, I realized that, because custom plates are inherently self-indulgent and often cringe-inducing, you must follow the folkways of those who came before you in order to achieve greatness in their composition. After all, you can't write a great sonnet without using iambic pentameter.
That got me thinking. What is the best, most poetic custom license plate possible, given the limitations and expectations of the form? Below is what I came up with:
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